John's Movie Musings

I enjoy the Mummy movies. They're decent enough stories that exist only to have fun. Branden Fraser plays his part great and conveys a sense of fun and adventure that's normally reserved for keg stands.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor is the third movie in the series. Now quick, when was the last time you saw a great third movie? I'll give you Return of the King, but just barely. The Lord of the Rings should really be considered a single movie. But think of all the other franchises out there: Spider-Man 3, X-Men 3, Superman 3, The Godfather: Part III, Jaws 3D... It's like those games you played as a kid where you try and say something more disgusting than the guy before you.

The biggest problem with The Mummy 3 is that they changed or removed everything that made the first two so much fun. Remember all the funny Brendan Fraser scenes (How often do you hear that question?)? Well, there are so many new characters that he doesn't get much screen time. He's just there to yell about how ironic it is to fight yet another mummy.

Remember Rachel Weisz? She played Brendan Fraser's very English significant other. I have to point out she's English, because she has an accent. Ms. Weisz decided to sit out The Mummy 3, so she got replaced with Maria Bello, a fine American actress...with a bad English accent.

Now I understand that sometimes you have to replace actors in movies. But these guys didn't even try. It's like replacing 007's M with Mrs. Doubtfire. People are gonna notice.

Finally, there's just too much non-mummy action taking place. When the undead skeleton army gets raised, I started quoting Army of Darkness in the hopes that it would get better. It did, but not enough to recapture my joy of the series.

Here's hoping the next Mummy stays dead.

Grade: D+